If you come back to me , I`ll be everything you need ,

3months 8days , 101days altogether .
It`s been great being with him . I felt warm , happy from the inside and outside .
I`m crying now . Since i doesn`t really know what to do now . So i guess by writing all my emotions here will makes me feel a little bit better .


The truth is , he broke up with me today . This afternoon .
He think a lot these days , no wonder he keeps so quiet doesn`t feel like making contact with me .
Am i really a bad girlfriend ?
I did my best already .
He told me maybe we arent meant to be together .
It hurts so fucking much when i saw what he wrote for me .


It was love at first sight when i first met him .
I wasnt joking .
He was tall , cute , charming , highly educated than me .
Making me feel secure around him .


I told him that i would give him more time to think .
He agreed to think over .


I begged for God , hoping God will understand how much i love him and make him patch back with me .
I knelled down and prayed .
I never cried so much before .
I really really really really do love him with all my heart .
If only he could see through me . .


I`m stressing him he told me .
I`m sorry Charles . I`m sorry . . . ... .
I`ve always thought you`ll going to be my last .
I put so much effort , trying to save my money to buy you stuff , making you cakes , folding stars for you .
I DID IT ALL WITH MY HEART ! !


My GOD ! WHY IS IT SO HARD TO LET GO ? ?
I`m crying , keep crying . Waiting for his replies .
I need hugs . Hugs and kisses from you . Charles .
I miss you .
What should i do to make you come back ?


I`m silly . For crying while having dinner together with family .
I`m sorry to make you suffer .
I`m sorry for what i did in the past .
I`m sorry for not treating you right .
I`m sorry for not being understanding .
I`m sorry for being jealous of Lily all the time .
I`m sorry for being attractive to you .
I`m sorry for being not educated .
I`m sorry for bothering you when you`re tired .
I`m sorry for missing you all the time .
I`m sorry for everything EVERYTHING that i DID .
I`m sorry for trying to hold you tight and afraid that one day you`ll be gone forever .
I`m sorry that i need you so much in life .
I`m sorry i`m sorry i`m sorry i`m sorry



I never hurt this much .
Baby please take it easy on me .
Punish me or do anything you want .
Just come back to me , okay ?





Dear blog ,
He`s the one i`m thinking about every morning when i woke up , while eating , showering , everything . .
I just cant get him outta my mind .
I started playing badminton because he loves badminton .
I played with mum , train myself to be stronger , so that next time i play with him , he`ll take notice on me .
Waa ? Ai Shang , my baby so pro .
I asked my friend to taught me how to make a cake .
Even though not his favorite chocolate cheese cake , but i did my best already .
I prepared his birthday present a month before .
Using day and night to fold those 520 stars .


I don`t know why , whatever thing i did for him , he doesnt felt touched at all .
I`m so hurt .
My nose is bleeding now . Including my heart .


Darling , if you really love me , let me be your only and last okay ?
I`m tired of breaking up .
No one understands how i actually felt .
Trying so hard , at the end , i get nothing .



I felt so alone .

His secrets revealed .

Tarzan finally told me what he think of me .
He has been keeping in his heart for quite a long time already .
Felt guilty and sorry for him ...


1.
He said i`m forcing him too much , doing whatever things he doesnt feel like doing .
(I don`t even know what i did . I just wanted him to accompany me if he`s free . Even if he`s busy , he can always find me and spend time with me using his free times .)


2.
Every time when he wanna sleep or what , i`ll become no mood .
(Sure no mood loh , but i still let him sleep what .)


3.
He said i wanted him to spend all of his time on messaging me or talking on phone to me .
(I said FREE time , well even if he`s busy at least tell me right ?)


4.
Every time when we went out , i`ll look like i`m super no mood , whats the point going out with him so often then ? And parents wanted him to concentrate on his studies first , so whenever he couldn`t go out , i`ll blame him .
(Super no mood ? He have no idea how happy i am . I didn`t blame him for not going out . I`m just moody because i waited and waited for him .)


5.
He hate it when i talk BAD things about him to my friends , he bet all my friends hate him now .
(Bad things huh ? I told them GOOD things instead , even my FAMILY . I asked them for advices thats all . They doesn't care much , why worry ?)


6.
Messaged Lily , Ex , still ask her not to tell him . Wanna ask her to spy on him ?
(Seriously , we are girls , girls understand girls , its not about spying , its about asking how are you there , is everything doing fine there ?)


So disappointed in him . For thinking this way about me .
Yet i`m still trying so hard , doing my best for him .
Waiting and thinking of him almost every single seconds and minutes .
He`s still the same , not being caring towards me .
Not thinking how i really felt all these times .
I began to see him like 5 previous ex . Not included another one .
What`s the difference ?
Same . Just same .
Never apologized for what he has done . Thinking he`s right every time when quarreled .
I apologized first , it doesn`t mean i`ve lost .
It means i care about his relationship more than him .
Since he doesn`t wants to talk about it or find me now .
I`ll just let him be .
Giving him time to think about it . Relax .


Everything`s going to be fine soon . I`m so glad that he speak up this to me .
I hope he`s not giving me up so easily because my friends asked me to be strong , and asking me not to give up on him .
Thanks Mr Darling . ^^v
I`ll be able to sleep well tonight .

Personality Test Of My Results :D

1. A kind of person you will be attracted to in a real life situation is those who have a split personality; cold as ice on the outside, but hot as fire in the heart.
2. In the process of courtship, the approach that makes you feel irresistible is being straightforward, and having your partner speak directly.
3. The impression you'd like to give to your lover is loyal and faithful.
4. One reason that would make you break up with your partner is his or her being ruthless, cold-blooded or ironic.
5. The kind of relationship you'd like to build with your partner is that you care not only about the present but also the future with your partner. A long-lasting relationship that you can grow with is important.
6. Would you commit adultery? Society and morality worry you. You wouldn't do anything wrong after marriage.
7. About marriage, you think marriage is a precious thing. Once you get married, you'll treasure your partner very much.
8. About love, at this moment, you think of love as a commitment for both parties.
   
   
   

You are a person with full of ambitions and creativity. You are very concerned about changes happening around you. You are also a very temperamental person.
YOUR LOVE
If you are a gay or lesbo, sorry it's not the real you! Did you notice that you are a "hot target" among the opposite sex?
You can easily attract the opposite sex. Basically you are a very popular person, so many people like to chat with you.

You are passive, sentimental, emotional, creative and rational. You don't have much self-confidence.


No one can take better care of you than yourself. Seeing the weakness of others will only make you feel stronger. So your ideal choice is that young timid trainee. He'll appreciate your protection, and you'll appreciate his appreciation.

You desire a love that will last forever. You are quite serious about finding this type of love, and that's why you think carefully about the men that you meet before deciding whether you could really love them. You don't just develop a crush on someone overnight: you look at a person's personality and other aspects of their life before deciding to form an attachment. If a guy doesn't meet your expectations, you would rather be alone. Your love has to be perfect. Be careful though, you could be missing out on some worthy relationships because your standards are so high

You love your friends very much - so much so that it's actually quite a worry. You may not be able to cope very well when you do lose somebody's friendship. You are a very sensitive and fragile person, and are therefore likely to get upset easily. You care for your friends and are willing to do anything that they ask you to do. Sometimes this can make your friends think that you are a bit of a nuisance. Nevertheless, people do really love you because your highest priority is your friends.

1. You've got great self-confidence and you're full of charm. Most guys who get to know you will be attracted to you. You are far from sweet and proper; your intriguing personality fascinates them. Most guys find it easy to fall for a girl like you.
2. You really care about other people's feelings and are quite serious about the issues that affect your life. You are sincere, and your concern for the well-being of others makes many people want to be your friend.
3. You are a bright, cheerful and bubbly person. You are thoughtful and considerate, and like to have fun. Everybody feels comfortable around you because of your pleasant nature. When you walk into a room, people's eyes are likely to be drawn to you because of your charm.
4. Your peers think of you as a fun person, but sometimes you can be a little irresponsible. You can be somewhat childish, and can try to ignore the fact that you will one day need to really grow up and be a mature adult! Perhaps you could start reading good books; they might help you look at the world in a different light. You do want to be taken seriously, right?
5. Your boyfriend believes that you are a strong and independent person. Your confidence and cheerfulness make you an attractive person to be around, but sometimes you need to pay more attention to what other people, including your boyfriend, are thinking.

1. You have 8 true friends.
2. You will have 2 true loves before getting married.
3. It is your work ethic that you rest for just a minute.
4. Here is the description of your ideal mate: "temperament"
5. CHARLES is the person you will never get over for the rest of your life.
6. You give 80% in a relationship.
   

1. When it comes to love, you fall in love very quickly and easily.
2. You give 75% to your relationship and expect to receive 25% in return.
3. If there is a problem in your relationship, you are able to confront it in an optimistic way and full of hope. You want to work it out right away, all by yourself.
4. You need lots of reassurance in your relationship. You'd like to see your loved one every day, if possible.
5. You accept your loved one the way they are. You don't expect him or her to change for you.
6. When you love someone, you tend to stay in love for a long time.
   

• You are easy to understand.
• How ambitious you are depends on the height that you answered, which is: top.
• You are stubborn, the size of this personality as seen by others is small.
• Diamond means stubborn personality.
• You are also down-to-earth.
• You are an opportunist.
• Your best friend is the one you need when you are in trouble.
  
• you are a realistic person, you are likely to be practical minded
• You are direct and know how to stay on course. You are confused when others complicate things that seem so clear to you.
• You are secure, stubborn, and stick to your ideals.
• The size of the ears indicates how good a listener you are. You got 3 out of 5.
• The length of the tail indicates the quality of your sex life. You got 3 out of 5.
• You are emotional and naive, you care little for details and are a risk-taker.
  
  

既然当初选择在一起，所以谁都不准先开口说 “ 分手 ” 这两个字。

爱是一种爱和被爱着的感觉，一种心灵的默契，一种刻骨铭心的思念，一种无须回报而心甘情愿的付出，一 种 为爱人的幸 福努力去打造 一 片天空， 一种渴望得到关怀、尊重、理解与包容，一种相依为命和善待彼此的过 程 ， 一种 心 动（ 思 念 时 ）、 心跳（相 见时） 、心痛（离别与伤害时）的感觉
爱一个人、要 了解也要开解、要道歉也要道谢、要认错 也要改错、要体贴也要体凉、要接受而不是忍受、是宽容 !!


幸福不会时时等着你，爱你的和你爱的人不是随时可以出现，请你学会珍惜。
当一个深爱着你的人为你而改变，那是因为他爱你，当你遇到一个人，他为你收起他的顽固脾气；也因为他爱你，他把你的兴趣也变成是他的兴趣时,,……还是因为他爱你.

喜欢一个人是没有理由的，无悔的付出

，都认为是值得的，只要能和相爱的人在一起。

其实我们的身边都有一些这样的人，只是（你.我.他）还没发现，最懂你的人，总是会一直的在你身边守护你，不让你有一丝的委屈；真正爱你的人，也许不会说许多爱你的话，却会做许多爱你的事。

如果你发现 身边有这样的人的话，请你好好珍惜……。

请你记住！摘不到的星星，总是最闪亮的，溜掉的小鱼，总是最美丽的。错过的电影，总是最好看的，失去的情人， 总是最懂你的。

这世界 上， 每个 人都有个 想要寻找的人，一但错过了， 就在也不会回来。

如果爱上，就不要轻易说放 弃 。闹别扭了，可能你后悔一阵子；但是你放弃了，可能使你后悔一辈子。经历过爱 情的人生才是美好，经不起考验的爱情是不深刻的。美好的爱情使人生丰富，经的起考验的爱情才是完美的.........

吵架後的開場白

處女座
龜毛等級★★★★★
善於自我總結的處女座並不是那種吵架之後還不知道自己錯在哪得星族，不過也正因為他 們知道自己處在何種狀況下才更加的不易開口先低頭。他們會在心中分析若自己先低頭，對方會怎樣想，以後的關系將會變成怎樣，以及若是先低頭怎樣將開場白才 不會太沒面子，才會讓對方感動，理解自己究竟為何生氣等等，結果當萬事都理清楚了，卻發現對方早已不在。


我爱的人是处女座
我在网上看到了这个
发现蛮准的
就抄了下来 :]

幸福与家庭，朋友

心情比一天又一天的差
最近真的发生了很多事情
不只是我自己的爱人对我变冷淡了 ， 我家庭的问题 ，亲戚的事情也有

我不懂该从哪里开始才好
但我开始觉得
如果一个女人真的爱上了一个男人， 当时间久了 ，就会越深爱他 ，也变得越会为她的爱人付出
连姐姐 ，妈妈 ，想不到就连一个我很开朗的姑姑都有这样的想法

姑姑昨天来了我家
和我们谈心事
因为没有人好谈了
又不能告诉家人这件事

事情是这样的
男人变心了
不再爱他老婆
出去找女人
被女人缠住不放
5年后才发现自己老公原来一直以来都在搞外遇
也才发现到自己其实已经被那个女人放药
吃了迷迷糊糊
老公也一样
吃到已经快记不了以前和他老婆快乐的日子

被人咒的感觉
咳嗽可以几年都不停
可以突然流鼻血

咳到痛
伤到痛
被打到痛
被骂到痛

却还不能 ，没那勇气和人分享
就这样让时间过去

是你 ，请问你会怎么办 ?

看着自己的丈夫和别的女人在一起
却什么事情都做不到
告诉朋友自己被女人下咒
朋友说她疯了
就这样只好静静地哭着

听着自己的丈夫骂她
说她很丑 ，臭鸡白 ，去死 ，老巫婆
心里是多么多么的难受

我妈妈的事情也是差不多
除了没有被诅咒以外
其它都有
我们都是被打到大的
所以会懂姑姑的感受

姑姑的儿子
看到自己爸爸打妈妈时
非常勇敢地冲过去打回爸爸
但是那个已经失去理智的父亲却就这样给孩子打了一巴掌

姑姑不肯告诉家庭这件事
怕自己的父亲听了后会气到会让心脏病发作

可悲
想到都没心情
心都为姑姑而感到痛
自己在晚上想起了以前所经历的事情
偷偷地哭了一场

加油姑姑
我相信总有一天那个女人会得到报应的
上帝不会辜负我们这些被欺负的人的

越在乎越得不到

愛情不像讀書考試一樣，對於一個人的追求

並不是你付出的越多，得到的回報就會越大

如果把你的給予當橫軸，別人的回應當縱軸畫成曲線

你會發現邊際遞減率在一個定值之後以非常不可思議的速度上升


為什麼，我每天打電話對她噓寒問暖，得到的只是冷漠的回應？

為什麼，在一群朋友出去玩的時候，她總是對我特別疏遠

為什麼，即使我竭盡所能的對她好，卻仍無法在她心中擁有一點應得的地位？

我說：「太在乎，就什麼也得不到」


當你太在乎一個人的時候，你的心裏能裝的下的東西就變少了

滿腦子想的都是她，無時無刻都在想能為她做些什麼

於是，你喪失了自我，成為一個為別人而活的人。


你不再有自己的生活，不再有和對方不一樣的地方

每說一句話，你都小心翼翼，期待能夠有好的響應

每做一件事，你都考慮再三，希望她能夠被你感動

然後你會發現，聊天的話題好像變少了，相處不在像從前當朋友般的開心自在


她隨口說出的一句話，網路上的一篇心情，可以牽動你全身的神經，有時讓你開心不已，

但大部分的時候卻是讓你魂不守舍一整天。

隨之而來的，是她開始感受到壓力


生命是一種很容易適應變化的東西

如同把雙腳泡在熱水中，不一會兒就從有點燙變成舒適的溫暖

一開始你對她好，感覺是很鮮明，很強烈的

會很開心，會很感激

但如果頻率太高，強度太大

就好像坐在按摩椅上太久一般

舒服的感覺不見了，

取而代之的是想要好好靜一下的需要。


如果這時還繼續強求下去

最後的結局就是分手甚至被討厭。

"欲擒故縱才是最高明的技巧"

大概大家聽到耳朵都爛了吧

你知道，我知道，可是就是做不到。

沒有辦法不對她好。


當我們越是在乎一個人的時候，越難拿捏自己的分寸

不是對她好到無以復加，就是賭氣強迫自己疏離耍自閉。

所以，最簡單的方法，就是不去在意

對自己好一點，努力追尋自己的理想


不斷的充實自己，為自己的將來做準備

功課不夠好嗎？去圖書館多K一些書吧

人長的不夠帥嗎？去健身房把自己變成陽光型男吧

嫌自己口才不佳，進對應退不夠圓滑，那麼參加社團磨練一番吧


這些事情，夠你忙的了然後，把她放在你心中的優先順序的第二位，甚至第三位

會發現，一切都變簡單了

不是說兩個人就一定會有結果

而是你開始可以跳脫這個泥沼，用更客觀精準的眼光

看待彼此之間的關係

不再動不動就心情低落，不再被對方牽著鼻子走。

因為你知道，世界不是由她構成的。


即使失敗了，也還有很多值得去追尋的目標。

然後，珍惜兩個人相處的時光

在一起的時候，可以用盡全部的力氣去對她好，讓她如沐春風

而平常的時候，則是為自己的目標付出百分之百的努力，不為了別人，只為了自己。

很輕鬆的，你不用在煩惱什麼時候該對她好，怎樣增加相處的機會

順其自然，你絕對會被珍惜，而不會被當作理所當然。


最後

成功了，恭喜，有情人終成眷屬。

失敗了，有點遺憾，也許是不適合，或許是沒緣分。

但無論如何，你都是贏家。

因為你又成長了。

Absolute Boyfriend !

Absolute Boyfriend .

I`m watching this drama lately . Kinda addicted to it .

The story is about a girl named Riiko Izawa who never had a boyfriend and she has been rejected by every boy she has ever had a crush on . When she returns a lost cell phone to an oddly dressed salesman , she mentions wanting a boyfriend . To thank her , he directs her to his company's website , Kronos Heaven . When she visits the site , Riiko finds it`s a site to create your perfect lover (so cool right ?) . Thinking it`s a game , she customizes and accidentally orders one . The next day , her new lover arrives . And the cute , romantic , sweet story goes on ~

Watching this drama making me feel like having one ideal boyfriend too :(

A perfect lover .

How educated he is , what can he do for you , how good he`ll be treating you , how handsome he is everything can be customized and be programmed .

Isn`t it cool ? ?

But my Dar ❤ is good enough for me already ^^v

Well except he likes to ignore all the problems we had and doesn`t wants to solve it together with me .

And being a little bit of selfish . Doesn`t put me in his eyes as a girlfriend but treated me the SAME as other GIRLS he knows .

Not good in comforting other girls and yes including me .

That`s the bad thing about him . 

Immature relationship . Again , for me .

Hmmm . . He`ll understand it , he needs to take his time ❤

Talking about this drama , Absolute Boyfriend .

If i had the chance to customize a perfect lover , i would want him to be like this .

1.

I wish he could really have some time listen to me .

If he`s having a busy schedule i understand , but i hope he can find a time when he`s not so busy and give me his full attention . Talk to me , texting with me , chatting , some outing will do .

At least this will make me stop and avoid me from wondering what he`s thinking and doing whole day long .

2.

I want him to be supportive and thoughtful .

Being thoughtful is usually hard for a man to do it .

But it`s the little things that count so much in a relationship , for girls .

Remembering something i liked , some special memorable dates for the both of us .

3.

And lastly , be LOVING ~

The best way to let me know that he loves me is to be loving and caring . 

Treat me good , better , different and special than any other girls he know .

This is very important .

With this , most other relationship problems or obstacles can be easily overcome .

It`s nighty time !

Time to sleep .

I`ll stop writing here :3

Here`s a poem for Charles my love ❤

Heavenly God full of grace
Bless Charles’s sexy face.
Bless his hair thick.

and keep him SAFE from the other girls.
Bless his little nose and toes
and keep him safe wherever he goes.
Bless his hands so big and strong
and help him keep them where they belong.
Bless his eyes that shine like stars
and keep his mind on me and his family
Bless his body the way it smells
if dad finds out he’d give me hell.
I’ll tell you lord he isn’t shy.
He has faults but so do I
Bless him lord because he’s my guy ❤

I love this song , it kinda describes me

Jasmine V Jealous

 I don't know, why I don't trust.
I go crazy when you hang with her
I need a straight jacket for my mouth
So my J-E-A-L-O-U-S feeling keep coming out

I might as well wrap him up in a bow,
All I'm doing is making him wanna go
I need you to help me through my doubt

So my J-E-A-L-O-U-S feelings don't bring us down
I don't wanna be nag naggin',
Don't wanna be drag draggin' you down,
Don't' wanna be pull pushin',
Look what I'm doing now
So I'm the girl I'm that jealous girl
J-E-A-L-O-U-S
Boy I don't know how you got me acting like this

How do I stop all these thought yeaaah
That maybe our love ain't strong enough yeah
I need to get a grip on myself
Before I push you right into the arms of someone, someone else
It's like I'm wrapping him up in a bow
Ooh oohh
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/j/jasmine_v/jealous.html ]
I need you to help me through my doubt
So my J-E-A-L-O-U-S feelings don't bring us down
I don't wanna be nag naggin',
Don't wanna be drag draggin' you down,
Don't' wanna be pull pushin',
Look what I'm doing now
So I'm the girl I'm that jealous girl
J-E-A-L-O-U-S
Boy I don't know how you got me acting like this

I don't wanna be nag naggin', ooohh
No I don't wanna be drag draggin' you dooown.
I'm the girl I'm that jealous girl
J-E-A-L-O-U-S
Boy I don't how you got me acting like this

(Thiiiss nooo)

I don't wanna be nag naggin',
Don't wanna be drag draggin' you dooown.
Don't wanna be pull pushin
Look I'm doing now
So I'm the girl I'm that jealous girl
J-E-A-L-O-U-S
Boy I don't know how you got me acting like this

I don't wanna be nag naggin', (ohohoh)
Don't wanna be drag draggin' you dooown.
Don't wanna be pull pushin
Look I'm doing now
So I'm the girl I'm that jealous girl
J-E-A-L-O-U-S
Boy I don't know how you got me acting like this

Ooooh!
Yeahhh yeaaah!
Acting like this oooh!
Boy I don't know how you got me acting like this

J-E-A-L-O-U-S
Boy I don't know how you got me acting like this

21st September

YOOHOO ! It`s 21st of the month again babehhhhhhhhh ~

Why am i so happy about it ?

Cause we are together for 3 months already .

Happy that we didnt break up and i`m looking forward to our 100days anniversary :3

I bought a necklace for him .

Wanted to give him by tonight cause we are going out with Kelvin and a guy who came back from New York ( i think) who named what liao :X George i think ? Oh my gosh ! We just met and then i forgot about his name ! 

Sad ><

Went to . . . The Springyyy again . Geez . I really hate that place .

It`s full of memories LOL !

Together with my ex boyfriends , ex friends , ex classmates . . Ex Ex Ex

Oh well , Ex stands for expired . 

Don`t want to think of them anymore .

Watched Johnny English at 8.15pm .

Tarzan asked me out so sudden .

I guess he really likes to give people surprise huh ?

But why not surprise me with other things ? wahaha

I watched him have his dinner , KFC at springy .

And took a picture of him eating :3

So damn cute !

I`m still wondering if i should upload it or not ?

Since some of my friends are reading my blog .

Ohhhhh he cut his hair ~ So short . But a bit longer looks nicer for him cause his forehead looks a bit baldy ><

He doesnt have much hair . When old probably botak Tarzan liao :b

Hehehe . Mine not much too lar . 

But i wish i have a bush of brown colored hair : /

No need dye or what hehehe .

Wont get bald also wahahaa !

Hehe oh well never mind :b

 

Cuteeeeee ! Like always .

Ngehehe . Took a snapshot of him eating chicken .

1 is enough . If nge nge take photo of him later he will notice me xD

He will shy what ~

 

Meeee ~

Don`t really feel like typing today . So i`ll just post some pictures loh .
Igloo with Bii and Yenn Tiing last night .

HAHAHA ! Want take pics of himself then kena the flash xD

Si gui ah bii . So vain xD



















I forgot what i`ve ordered .                                                    Yenn Tiing and Ah Bii`s Chocolate :O
Strawberry something :O

 

Peace ~

Marry Me ?

Recently , i`ve heard a song from the radio sang by Bruno Mars , Marry You and yeah , i`ve started listening to it everyday :D
The lyrics are so damn sweet !

On the way to Santubong , Toothpaste sang this song . Aiyo so cuteee !
How nice would it be if he sings this song face to face to me C:
Hmm , or maybe holding a bouquet of roses while singing to me ? Eee ~
I know i know , i`m dreaming too much .
But i guess every single girls should also have thought of how their man propose to them too what .


Owh man .
I`m missing him a lot . And we just met like couple of days ago .
Quite long lah few days bo ><


He`s going to Lundu 2mlo with his church friends .
Church`s event .
*sighs* 
I hope i`m in the same church as him .
And then all his church friends including his family will know at least a little bit about me .
My mum allowed me to go to church with him .
But he doesn`t wants to bring me : /


He`s leaving Kuching soon .
Probably on 25th of September .
Next Sunday .


Oh geez :'/
Leaving me here all alone again .
I hate that feeling .
I wanted to go KL with him but i cant .
Needa go Kedah for my sister`s graduation ceremony .


So yeah , i`ve planned !
After back from Kedah , i`ll find any promoter jobs with high salary .
And when i get enough money to spend on , i`ll fly to KL .
Alone or maybe with my brother ? If he is going KL for any meetings .
Hehe .
YES ! It`s a big big secret !
Big big surprise for him and his KL friends !

I wonder how he`ll react ~ happy ? shock ? or frighten ? 


Eeeeee yeepee ~ ❤
Man i loveeeeeeee him like x1000000000000000000000000000000000000+++ so so so much .
Hope i`m not loving the wrong person this time .
Cuz if i really do , i`m sure tat i`m going to get hurt very very very damn much .

This is not the official mv of the song Marry You , but then i like it very much .

Sweet eih ~

hehe owh Toothpaste =b

It's a beautiful night
We're looking for something dumb to do
Hey baby
I think I wanna marry you

Is it the look in your eyes
Or is it this dancing juice?
Who cares, baby
I think I wanna marry you

Well, I know this little chapel
On the boulevard we can go
No one will know
Oh, come on girl

Who cares if we're trashed
Got a pocket full of cash we can blow
Shots of patron
And it's on, girl

Don't say no, no, no, no, no
Just say yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
And we'll go, go, go, go, go
If you're ready, like I'm ready

'Cause it's a beautiful night
We're looking for something dumb to do
Hey baby
I think I wanna marry you

Is it the look in your eyes
Or is it this dancing juice?
Who cares, baby
I think I wanna marry you

I'll go get a ring
Let the choir bells sing like
Ooh, so what ya wanna do?
Let's just run, girl

If we wake up and you
Wanna break up, that's cool
No, I won't blame you
It was fun, girl

Don't say no, no, no, no, no
Just say yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
And we'll go, go, go, go, go
If you're ready, like I'm ready

'Cause it's a beautiful night
We're looking for something dumb to do
Hey baby
I think I wanna marry you

Is it the look in your eyes
Or is it this dancing juice?
Who cares, baby
I think I wanna marry you

Just say I do
Tell me right now, baby
Tell me right now, baby, baby

Just say I do
Tell me right now, baby
Tell me right now, baby, baby, oh

It's a beautiful night
We're looking for something dumb to do
Hey baby
I think I wanna marry you

Is it the look in your eyes
Or is it this dancing juice
Who cares, baby
I think I wanna marry you

Santubong

If you`re wondering if i got take any pictures with him or not , the answer is no .
So yeah , no pictures .
My blog are fulled of words only : /
Nothing to see .

Oh wait ! I took this photo while they are playing cards at the lobby hall .

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm . . .
Many people ask me fun or not going there with him and his friends .
I think i answer here better lah LOL !
Say fun also not fun wor , say not fun also not , not fun wor .

2days 1 night .
Tarzan paid for me .
Aiti paiseh si : /
Always use his money , spent a lot .

We went there on Thursday morning by Kelvin`s kancil .
China man (i don`t know his name until now hahahaha !) , Kerry , Kelvin , Tarzan and me .
Aiyo , my appetite not good loh .
Didn`t finish maggie that my mum cooked for me .
Went breakfast with them , but i ordered ice lemon tea only .

Waa ~ Tarzan ate a lot .
Emperor`s noodle + fries + sandwiches + ice lemon tea .
Peng .
Fat daooo ~

I remember that when we went in the room ,
I switched off the lights in the bathroom , making Tarzan ran out from the toilet`s room LOL ! ! !
Asking me to on it back don`t play with the switches =b

After checked in , we went down for a swim .
Funny that santubong`s resort doesn`t have anybody there except the 5 of us .
Swim lai swim ki also see same people .
Talk also got echo hahaha !
Stupid that tarzan so funny !
At there play with echo sound ba hahahaha ! Talking loud just to hear the echo hahahaha !

On the way to beach , ARGH ! MY SLIPPER ! cacat one ! ! Spoiled ba
So suey man . .
Barefoot loh . Walked to the beach .
Hahaha !

No people also , except for branches and white sands + dirty sea water with no waves =.=''
Then his friends blamed him for choosing santubong hahaha !
Really 3 , 2 BOK lorh hahahhaha !

Played Kelvin`s PS2 in his room with him and Tarzan .
Kia shu . Tarzan play till lose liao at there scream and shout CELAKA CELAKA ! JI LAR KAHHH !
The China man still ngong ngong asked us whats the meaning of celaka LOLLL ! ! !
Noobie Tarzan .
I beat him in Naruto`s game =b =b
CELAKA CELAKA ! HAHAHA
But 2nd match i lost liao .
My turn to CELAKA CELAKA !
His friend , Kerry say i`m kia shu ><
Same as Tarzan what hahaha !

Alright so , no lunch in the afternoon , i starved till night .
Puasa bah xD
Arao arao ~ (tummy`s sound)
Ordered some foods from the menu in the hotel .

Well , guess what ?
When i saw those foods , i straight turned off my appetite liao .
Don`t really know what happened to me lar
I think i`m sick of eating fried , any oily or dry foods , ect those chicken ? Fried rice like that .

I almost puke D:
Drank lots of cola after that .
I thought i`m the one who`s feeling unwell , but who knows ?
Tarzan asked me to accompany him back to the room .
>>> laosai <<< hahahahaha !
Eh eh ~ Don`t laugh lei Ai Shang .

Cause after his turn , i got stomachache as well .
SIEN ! I went in the bathroom walooooooooo GROSS !
That awful pangsai + pangpui smell of his !
AIYO ! Acidic you know ?!

I used hair dryer to blow the smelly air away hahaha !
Siennnnn ! Ish ><
I want puke already bah still let me smell tiok gok
His turn to laugh back at me .

Whole night not feeling well .
Rest awhile i accompany him back to Kelvin`s room bringing cards .
Ban lak , Choi dai di .
Play lah play lah .
I watched them play only . Don`t feel like joining .
Waste money nia cause my luck always not good .

Play till 12something , i went back to the room myself to have a bath .
Poor lil kitten Tarzan is unfortunately afraid of the DARK ! And momok at night .
Still ask me to bring him back from Kelvin`s room . LOL !

Oh yeah , before that , i asked Tarzan to go out to have a night walk with me .
Borrowing Kelvin`s slippers xD
Chao kuan ! !
Scare bah that Tarzan ! OMG ! =.=
Say what saw something falling from the trees .
Haiya ! Leaves lah !
Arbo monkey har ? Wu wu ak ak ?
Went back to the room after walking DOWN till the stairs nia walaoooooooo ~
5 mins walk .
Can`t believe that i`m even "man" than him .

SLEEPING TIMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Dudeeeeeeeee ! I cant sleep ! He is snoring so loud ! And he sleeps so near to me aiti push me till i almost drop on the floor .
Funny bah xD
Wearing ah pek`s pajamans hahahahhaha !

Didnt really sleep that night .
Just closed my eyes and woke up almost every few hours .
Woke at around 4am in the morning , went to the bathroom .
Opps woke him up as well .
Well yeah , dark ma LOL ! Got people takut what .
Wants his mummy -.-''

Then he continue to sleep again .
I walked to the bathroom , to the balcony , to the bathroom , to the balcony till sunrise LOL !
I even set alarm for him then i went to bath :b
Everly Brother`s - All I Have To Do Is Dream !

Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
When I want you in my arms
When I want you and all your charms
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream

HAHAHA !
I laughed in the bathroom when i heard the alarm LOL ! ! ! !
Shhhhhhhh ~
He off it bah beh tahan hahahaha !
I lay in the bathtub xiang shou ~ :b
Like 1 hour inside -.-''

7pm liao still don`t want wake ?
I sat on the floor beside the bed watching him . . SNORING !
HAHAHAHAHAHAH !
And also did some drawing on the paper hehe .
Threw it away dy though .
I wanted to take a picture of him sleeping but aiyo my handphone lousy no flash no nothing .
Too dark in the room some more , cant even take pictures .

8pm liao . I whispered to him . qi chuang lor ~
Enn enn ~ Enn pigu this Tarzan .
"gei wo 5 fen zhong"
Okay .
10mins i gave him .
I beh tahan liao . I put music near his ear .
HAHA ! Then he said okok .
Continue i switched on the lights , and pulled the curtains .

He called Kelvin asking whether they wake yet . LOL ! Tiok *kap* bah the phone HAHAHA !
Kolien Tarzan .
Still ask me to call him back want me tiok *kap* hahahah !

So yeah , breakfast .
I`m seriously feeling not happy liao .
I went down myself wearing his crocs`s shoes cause he doesnt wants to follow .
So itchy bah ee no wash his shoes yucks .
Sitting there alone watching few couples dating , family having fun there in the pool .
Oh yeah , after all it`s friday , public holiday .
Jealous eh . Why didnt tarzan go morning walk with me T.T

Breakfast . Sien .
I`m hungry actually . But no appetite .
The china man , Kerry , Tarzan and me went for breakfast , leaving Kelvin alone in the room sleeping :X
I felt so sorry for him .
Cause i didnt had much during breakfast .
And Kerry was like , walao u ate so little ? Should have call Kelvin down to eat . You go back to the room lah .
Sorry Kerry and Kelvin ><
Should let Kelvin eat arh aiyo

I think i ate too much leh . Wanna puke again :'/
Went back to the room after that , sitting there hugging pillow ><
They thought i emo .
Well , yeah i am emo-ing .
Later all of them went to other room to play Naruto again .
I took few minutes of sleep there in the room =b
Heard tarzan screaming CELAKAAAAAAAAAAAAA ! walao !

So loud ! Paiseh -.-''
Yesh ! Zhun when i want to poop no one is in the room XD
Went shower after that . To shower away laosai smell
LOL ! !
Don`t want any of them to smell it XD

Emo till check out loh .
Then go back home . SLEEP !
Slept for 5 hours .
Now i am 80% awake while typing this .

My Alarm clock`s song . HAHAHA ! 

Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
When I want you in my arms
When I want you and all your charms
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream

When I feel blue in the night
And I need you to hold me tight
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam

I can make you mine, taste your lips of wine
Anytime night or day
Only trouble is, gee whiz
I'm dreamin' my life away

I need you so that I could die
I love you so and that is why
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam

I can make you mine, taste your lips of wine
Anytime night or day
Only trouble is, gee whiz
I'm dreamin' my life away

I need you so that I could die
I love you so and that is why
Whenever I want you, all I have to do is
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream
Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream

Drea-ea-ea-ea-eam, dream, dream, dream

Mum

Right after i got back from Secret Recipe .
Washed my face and blah blah all those .
I went up to my mum`s room .
Saw her sitting there meditating .
I switched on the light , saw some pictures with a letter sticking on the mirror .

Pictures .
Pictures of my dad and 1 fucking woman`s face .
Taken on bed .
Smile till soo fucking happy gok .
Pubo !

What have my mum done anyway ?
All she did for all these years are for us , for her family .
She loves him so much and this is what she get from him ?

Aiyo . .
She slept with me that night .
I pat her shoulder , hugging her tight while sleeping .
Telling her everything`s gonna be okay .
Even though i know it`ll still be the same lah no matter how many times we give him the chance .
He`ll never appreciate us .

Remembered the time when he slapped my mum and punched her on face .
Fuck ! Ki huey !
We females are not weak !
Mum just love him more than anything he could ever imagine , thats why she stood there let him beat .
Aiyo mum , you`re stupid also , why let him punch you ?

Eh LOL ! So late already ah ? waa
I better sleep now .
Love you mum !
Take care always .
WE WILL WE WILL ! SUPPORT YOU ! SUPPORT YOU !
WE WILL WE WILL ! SUPPORT YOU ! SUPPORT YOU !
Rock you mum ! \m/ > ◯ < \m/

Mooncake Festival

Boo no pictures for this year`s mooncake festival .
Went out with Adrian and the gang in the afternoon , to MARS cyber .
LEFT4DEAD ! OH YEAHH BABY ! !
Haiyo but played till halfway Tiing needs to go to work liao , so went back around 4/5pm .

At night , i went out with Dar :3
He hate those crowded places .
But he still brought me there to Friendship Park to find my friends :b
Went there also awhile loh .
Wanted to see Ah Hun`s kong ming deng baa ~
Who knows he said his kong ming deng not yet arrive chey ~
Very pretty loh ~ Too bad i forgot to take some pictures ish stupid me !

After that , we went airport to pick Kelvin up from SG .
Waa lengzai ba ~
He brought a China man back . Ee why not china chick ? hehehe
Hmm . .
Met Kelvin`s grandma at his new house .
So cute wei !
The way she talked to me hehehe .
Asking me , who is that guy with the black and white stripped shirt guy ?
Sorry wor , i`m too shy to tell granny xD
I told her we are just friends , good friends , but i think she know also laaa even if i didnt say xD

Leonard , err that zz guy :X
Asked tarzan to celebrate one of their friend`s birthday at Secret Recipe and so Kelvin , the china man , me and 1 more idk guy tagged along .

Hahaha . I think they saw too many strangers there with tarzan , so we separated our tables .
I don`t like that actually .
Can make friends de ma why need separate right ? Ee
Had cakes , marble cheese , white chocolate and err duno la LOL !
The marble cheese cake so delicious ! Compared to mine ><
Geez , aiyo nvm lah . It was my first time making that cake what . LOL ! Self comfort bah .
Somehow tarzan likes it . Ee so glad :b
His family all got try wor ~ eeee XD XD XD
Sot liao okok enough .

Oh yeah that crazy tarzan .
Trying to kiss me in front of his friends LOL !
Shock bah walao !
Chikorpek meh ?
But hehe cute laaa xD

Tarzan`s grandma passed away on 9.9.2011 around 10-11pm
Today , he called me , telling me that his grandpa wanted to commit suicide D:
Aiyo so sad wei !
True love ba !

I think his grandpa miss grandma too much already , so sad wei the story :/
He ate panadol pills till went in GH .
But i think he`s fine now .

Hmm . .
Sad sad Tarzan cant accompany me this coming moon cake festival .
I`m looking forward to it though .
Now i`m not .
Since he can`t go out with me on that day .
Geez .
God bless his family , please don`t let anything happen to his family again.

Went out with Ah Bii , Hun and Tiing last night .
To Carpenter Street .
MOON CAKE FESTIVAL ! YAY !

Chey ~ Without him ma ><
Saw many people holding hands walking together on streets .
Looking so happy , feeding each other eat .
Aiyo jealous dao ~


But that timid Tarzan doesnt dare to hold ma hands here in kuching .
Too many relatives and friends here around wor .
Scare his mama will found out wor : /
Aiyaa ~ Aunty ! Please let us paktoh leh ~
Wo men liang ge hen xing ku !


So old liao loh that Tarzan but still can`t paktoh .
Adrian said , maybe his parents warned him not to date until he finished studying , last time .
Till now he keep in mind , doesnt dare to date in front of his parents .
Well unless i`m in KL , that would be a different story .


GUESS WHAT ?
He asked me to go KL with him ~ hehehhee
But i cant .
Gotta go Kedah for my sister`s graduation ceremony .
Oh geez !
I havent buy any formal pants ! and shoes ! argh ! T-T
Cham liao . Wear what there later ?
Lao kui my sister ><

Aiyo . . nvm .
Still enough time xD

Badminton Day with HIM :D

LOL ! im supposed to posted this up last night but i was tired . so yeah :b

yes im happy , very :]
he asked me whether i`m free to go badminton with him and his friends .
OF COURSE IM FREE LAAAA ~

had fun there ~
saw the *stalker* there playing also ><
i told tarzan about it .
he gave me a wink ~ eeeee ~ cute dao ~

so hao lien loh .
nge nge smash ppl .
0 - 21 wor ~
seriously i like to sit at the back there watching him play .
so shuai , so handsome <3

i played with his friends when he went to other side of the court to play with pros .
haha fun eh ~ they kua suey me gok !
thought i duno how to play ma
then cincai lai
hmph ~ luckily i got train a bit at home with mum
arbo really tiok them kua suey liao .

leg pain on the next day .
geez .
till now D:
i walk like ah ma gok aisi loh

Daniel`s Farewell Party

Daniel is a nice guy .
Caring and friendly .
Too bad he`s leaving on this sunday to India .

He knows that !@#$%^&* wont be talking to me there at the party , but he still invited me .
He brought Natasha along .
Accompany me .
Helped us to take foods and yeah . .

Both me and Natasha doesn`t dare to go in the house . LOL !
Was afraid of them .
Then Daniel invite us in gok hahaha !

Everyone is staring at me and Natasha .
Gosh that feeling ><
Im trembling arh holding sha`s hand .
Hiding from behind .
Haha . Don`t let them see my ugly face .

We sat there sms-ing nia loh . Waiting for Daniel to serve us .
Paiseh arh aiti .

And there , i was thinking .
It`s not at Tarzan`s house now anyway .
Parents are not here also what .
Why wouldn`t he dare to talk to me ?
So sad you know ? : /

Act like we`re strangers , and he talked to other girls more than me .
I shouldn`t go there to that party .
Wasted my time watching him and other girls laughing and talking loud there .

Walao . So jiet !
Completely no mood to eat .
I ate 1 chicken wing , a bit of fried rice and 1 hot dog .

My stomach is growling now when typing this .
My mum was right .
Timid guy like him , so bek cek ah if this continues .
Everything scare scare scare .
Why chase me at first ?

AI SHANG ! Faster leave kuching lah !
Since he doesn`t appreciate me here in kuching .
I`ll just leave this place as far as i could .

All those love and caring i gave is just a SMALL thing to him .
It doesn`t even matter to him .

I`m not a bad girlfriend , he is the one who is bad now .
He thinks about himself only .
Selfish act .
Bek Cek .

What am i to you ? 

Heart-attack

ARGH ! ! !
The both of us quarreled last night again .
Then i`m being soooooo lao kaypoh i posted "he`s a guy who never keep his promises" on facebook , status .

His friends inbox me asking me what happened .
And they also inbox or texted him asking the same question .
ADUHH !

He was seriously mad for the first time .
I`m so scared arh !
Tried to call him but he wouldn`t answer the phone .
But then , cheh he told me that his mother was there with him .
Scare the crap out of me -.-''

Aiyooooo he scolded me arh asking me whether if i`m happy for letting the world know about it .
Sorry sorry sorry D:
I swore i would never do that again T-T

I feel my heart pumping so fast till i need to gasp for air LOL
Yeah im not joking ><
I`m scared .
Cause , this may be the first time i`m trying to catch a guy tight .
I don`t wanna let go : /

Sorry . Haiz .
I know i`m a bad girlfriend :/
But i do love you very much .

Ring

Boo , lost my ring today .
Or yesterday ? Last night ? D:

Not any special ring larh but then got feel towards the ring already : /
Wore it quite long time already .
“ 防小人” ma that ring LOL !

Oh well . I guess i`ll just have to buy another . Boo

Lalala

1、相愛是緣，相守是份，緣是天定，份是人為。

2、沒有誰對不起誰，只有誰不懂得珍惜誰 。

3、誰都不會是誰的誰 。

4、如果幸福那麼容易得到，怎麼會有種叫做眼淚的東西 。

5、走在一起，是緣份，一起在走，是幸福 。  

 

6、沒有人告訴你哪種堅持是值得的，哪種人是不能愛的，

只有自己經歷了才知道 。

7、我愛你、但為了你的幸福、我願意放棄一切 _ 包括你 。

8、愛情本來並不復雜，來來去去不過三個字：我愛你、我恨你、算了吧、你好嗎？對不起。